Don't Surround Yourself with Like-Minded People
Contrary to popular belief, it's about being around like-hearted people.
We’ve all heard the popular phrase, “surround yourself with like-minded people.” But have we ever paused to think what that phrase means? It is doubtful any growth or creativity comes from a room full of people who think the same. If everyone thinks the same, it means no one is thinking!
Over the weekend I was on a hike with a new friend, Aidee. Funny enough our friendship came as the result of Facebook Marketplace. A few months ago I was selling a chair and someone came to buy it and pick it up. Neither of us expected from the transaction that we would find a new genuine friendship.
Last week, we went hiking one sunny afternoon. Among the trees and creeks, our conversation turned to the subject of like-minded people.
“You know, I think part of the problem with the state of the world is that everyone just wants to be around people who are like them,” my friend said. “Maybe I’m weird but I like to be around people who are different than me. If we are only around people who think and act the same as us, what do we expect to learn?”
How curious that this person I met through Facebook Marketplace, of all places, shared my sentiments. Something I had thought about repeatedly but never voiced.
It wasn’t the first time I heard something like this. “It’s not about being like-minded, it’s about being like-hearted,” my mentor Charisse had once told me.
“It’s not about being like-minded, it’s about being like-hearted.”
The issues with humanity arise when we cannot entertain other’s ways of thinking or living. It does us no good to silo ourselves only with people who think the same as us.
The sweet spot is when we align ourselves with people who share similar values of the heart. When we can have differences of opinion and perspectives, yet share common ground on values that matter. Values like empathy, compassion, and courage.
The word, courage, means “of the heart”.
In Nelson Mandela’s words, “I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.”
The beauty of humanity is the wide spectrum of ideas and perspectives we all have. Each person comes to this life with a unique set of gifts. Courage exists not only in our willingness to share those gifts with others but also in our willingness to be open to receiving the gifts others have to share with us.
Many of the struggles we see in the world are in the absence of courage. Ego, greed, and prejudice all thrive in the absence of courage and love. The danger arises when like-minded people become isolated to their own ways of thinking.
We must challenge ourselves to do better in listening to those who think differently than us. It takes courage to let our voices be heard and also hear other voices.
I hope that each of us can challenge ourselves to align with people who are like-hearted and to have the courage to surround ourselves with those who have different perspectives than us.
The magic exists when we realize that despite our differences we share the same core.
Recognizing that our strength lies in our diversity came to my mind as I read this. Yet with diversity there is much that we all have in common, that we all share. Listening and responding, maybe not even responding but pondering, rather than reacting mindlessly to others, to their words and even their actions is necessary. Question and be curious. Thank you Maria for another interesting piece that provides food for thought.
Love this Maria!